Teaching manners, respect, and self-discipline is the #1 priority in my household. One challenge is getting Sam to brush his teeth morning and night. But teeth are expensive, and we need to be consistent. It’s a habit we need to build.
Have I successfully done it? Not. I’m pretty good about doing it at least once a day, but some days it doesn’t happen. It’s not that I forget – it just tends to be such a treacherous part of our day until recently.
I was in the grocery store, in the toothpaste aisle. I’ve only bought him mint toothpaste. So I started looking at the different flavors of kids’ toothpaste, and I saw bubblegum and remembered how much I loved the bubblegum flavor as a kid.
You guys, it was like the clouds parted. I bought some strawberry bubblegum kids toothpaste.
I thought the lack of brushing was just a moral failing on my part; I was too lazy, too undisciplined to help Sam build a necessary habit. But really? He didn’t like the taste of mint.
This has made me realize that when presented with a change you want to make a habit you want to build, if you’re encountering resistance in yourself, you should lean into that resistance and really investigate what’s causing it, then work on accommodating that.
Say you hate washing dishes, so they pile up, and then you’re overwhelmed by how many you have to do. Why do you hate it? Deep down, what about it do you dislike? Is touching wet food super gross for you? Try thick rubber gloves while you’re washing. Does the sound of dishes clanking together grate your nerves? Do them with headphones in and turned up loud. Do you hate the smell? Light some candles, spray some air freshener.
Do these things instead of gritting your teeth, failing, and getting discouraged by your “lack of self-discipline.”
Relying on self-discipline, forcing yourself, and gritting through doesn’t always work. Lean in, listen to your discomfort, and find what makes the task hard. Also, your child may just not like mint toothpaste.
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